10 Things We Grieve After a Breakup (and Journaling Prompts to Help You Start Healing)
Grief after a breakup is real — and it’s not just about losing the person. It’s about losing the life you built, the future you imagined, and the version of yourself that existed in that love. When we name what we’re grieving, we start to understand our pain in a deeper, more compassionate way.
Here are ten things people often grieve after a breakup — and gentle journaling prompts to help you process each one.
1. Love
You poured your heart into this relationship. That love doesn’t just disappear — it lingers, even when the relationship ends.
Journal prompt: What did loving this person teach you about the way you love?
2. Trust
It’s hard to rebuild trust after feeling betrayed, blindsided, or let down. Sometimes, we stop trusting ourselves too.
Journal prompt: Where do I need to remind myself that I can trust my own judgment again?
3. Future
You might’ve pictured a shared home, trips, kids, or growing old together — and now it feels like that future was erased.
Journal prompt: What parts of that imagined future can I still create for myself, in a new way?
4. Intimacy
The closeness, the small rituals, the way they knew you — those moments can feel irreplaceable.
Journal prompt: What kind of emotional or physical intimacy do I want to cultivate in my next chapter?
5. Companionship
Losing your person — the one you texted about your day or watched shows with — leaves a deep emptiness.
Journal prompt: Who or what can I turn to for connection and comfort right now?
6. Identity
Sometimes, our sense of self gets wrapped up in “we.” After a breakup, you might wonder who you are without them.
Journal prompt: Who am I rediscovering or becoming as I step back into “me”?
7. Routine
Even small things — morning coffee together, their goodnight text — become emotional anchors that suddenly vanish.
Journal prompt: What new or nurturing routine could help bring me comfort or stability right now?
8. Memories
Certain songs, restaurants, or places now carry a sting. Letting go doesn’t mean erasing — it means holding memories with compassion.
Journal prompt: What memories do I want to keep with gratitude, and which ones am I ready to release?
9. Security
Relationships often provide emotional or financial stability. Losing that can create a sense of uncertainty or fear.
Journal prompt: How can I start rebuilding a sense of safety and security within myself?
10. Validation
Sometimes, love felt like proof of being wanted or worthy. When it ends, that sense of worth can feel shaken.
Journal prompt: What qualities make me lovable, even without someone else’s approval?
A Final Note
Breakup grief is multilayered. You’re not just mourning the loss of a person — you’re grieving parts of yourself, your story, and your dreams. Healing means making space for new versions of love, trust, and hope to return.
Hi! I’m Nicole, therapist in Long Beach.
I specialize in working with people going through a breakup, wanting to understand and improve their attachment issues, or past trauma with EMDR.
